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The big mistake that men make is that when they turn thirteen or fourteen and all of a sudden they've reached puberty, they believe that they like women. Actually, you're just horny. It doesn't mean you like women any more at twenty-one than you did at ten.
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Jules Feiffer Quotes

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 women  

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You can take no credit for beauty at sixteen. But if you are beautiful at sixty, it will be your soul's own doing.
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Marie Stopes Quotes

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 beauty  

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Old age is fifteen years older than I am.
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Oliver Wendell Holmes Quotes

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 age  

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Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
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P.J. O'Rourke Quotes

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 government  

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Telling a teenager the facts of life is like giving a fish a bath.
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Arnold Glasow Quotes

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 teenagers  

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At fourteen you don't need sickness or death for tragedy.
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Jessamyn West Quotes

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 teenagers  

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Rugby football is a game I can't claim absolutely to understand in all its niceties, if you know what I mean. I can follow the broad, general principles, of course. I mean to say, I know that the main scheme is to work the ball down the field somehow and deposit it over the line at the other end and that, in order to squalch this programme, each side is allowed to put in a certain amount of assault and battery and do things to its fellowman which, if done elsewhere, would result in fourteen days without the option, coupled with some strong remarks from the Bench.
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P.G. Wodehouse Quotes

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 football  

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Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but television's message has always been that the need for truth, wisdom and world peace pales by comparison with the need for a toothpaste that offers whiter teeth and fresher breath.
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Dave Barry Quotes

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 television  

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Getting down on all fours and imitating a rhinoceros stops babies from crying.(Put an empty cigarette pack on your nose for a horn and make loud "snort" noises.) I don't know why parents don't do this more often. Usually it makes the kid laugh. Sometimes it sends him into shock. Either way it quiets him down. If you're a parent, acting like a rhino has another advantage. Keep it up until the kid is a teenager and he definitely won't have his friends hanging around your house all the time.
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P.J. O'Rourke Quotes

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 babies  parents  

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We are students of words: we are shut up in schools, and colleges, and recitation-rooms, for ten or fifteen years, and come out at last with a bag of wind, a memory of words, and do not know a thing.
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Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes

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 education  

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I have diligently numbered the days of pure and genuine happiness which have fallen to my lot: they amount to fourteen.
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Abd-El-Raham Quotes

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 happiness  

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Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate.
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Sandra Boynton Quotes

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 desserts  

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He who devotes sixteen hours a day to hard study may become at sixty as wise as he thought himself at twenty.
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Mary Wilson Little Quotes

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 wisdom  

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Heredity is what sets the parents of a teenager wondering about each other.
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Laurence J. Peter Quotes

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 teenagers  

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In Italy, the Inquisition was condemning people to death until the end of the eighteenth century, and inquisitional torture was not abolished in the Catholic Church until 1816. The last bastion of support for the reality of witchcraft and the necessity of punishment has been the Christian churches.
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Carl Sagan Quotes

Any astronomer can predict with absolute accuracy just where every star in the universe will be at 11.30 tonight. He can make no such prediction about his teenage daughter.
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James T. Adams Quotes

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 daughters  

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As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
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Fran Lebowitz Quotes

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 teenagers  telephones  

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Teenagers complain there's nothing to do, then stay out all night doing it.
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Bob Phillips Quotes

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 teenagers  

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A baby-sitter is a teenager who gets two dollars an hour to eat five dollars worth of your food.
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Henny Youngman Quotes

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 teenagers  

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It takes seventeen muscles to smile and forty-three to frown.
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Author Unknown Quotes

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 smiles  

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