Quotes by Rita Rudner

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I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
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 dogs  

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Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.
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 pregnancy  

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Have children while your parents are still young enough to take care of them.
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 grandparents  

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The word aerobics came about when the gym instructors got together and said, "If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it jumping up and down."
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 exercise  

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Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?
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 sex  

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When I meet a man I ask myself, 'Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?'
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 children  

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