Quotes by Fran Lebowitz

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Displaying 1 to 10 out of 13 Quotes

All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.
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Fran Lebowitz Quotes

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 children  

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As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
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Fran Lebowitz Quotes

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 teenagers  telephones  

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The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink.
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 telephones  

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When it comes to sports I am not particularly interested. Generally speaking, I look upon them as dangerous and tiring activities performed by people with whom I share nothing except the right to trial by jury.
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 sports  

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Large, naked raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who lie in hutches eagerly awaiting Easter.
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 food  easter  

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If you removed all of the homosexuals and homosexual influence from what is generally regarded as American culture, you would pretty much be left with "Let's Make a Deal."
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 homosexuality  

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There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness and death.
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 curmudgeon  

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Life is something that happens when you can't get to sleep.
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 sleep  

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Girls who put out are tramps. Girls who don't are ladies. This is, however, a rather archaic usage of the word. Should one of you boys happen upon a girl who doesn't put out, do not jump to the conclusion that you have found a lady. What you have probably found is a Lesbian.
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Fran Lebowitz Quotes

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 homosexuality  

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Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is therefore both unseemly and unproductive to irritate the situation by making an effort. If you have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, simply eat something sweet and the feeling will pass.
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Fran Lebowitz Quotes

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 art  

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